The Dating Buzzer
Everyone should come with a built in dating buzzer located in their left upper arm. The dating buzzer could be pushed (or punched depending on your needs) when you know that the date is utterly and completely beyond retrieval. An incident has occurred that you know just sealed the evening, and now you are searching desperately for a way out. Like a moth caught between a screen door and a main door, there is just enough room to flap around desperately ... but no escape. The dating buzzer would provide an instant escape - out into the night and much needed freedom.
So when you catch your date staring at the waitress's breasts or butt and he says "Boy, is she stacked!"
Wham! Hit the dating buzzer and you are instantly at home with a good book and a hot bath and your date is being boiled in oil - in medieval England.
or...
Your date casually brings up, "So I used to date this prostitute..."
Wham! You are now enjoying a nice glass of wine with friends while your date is being chased across Siberia - by woolly mammoths.
or...
Your date says "Well, I am separated, I just haven't called the lawyer yet."
Wham! Dating buzzer to the rescue...
You are enjoying time at the spa, while your date is shackled to a Viking raider ship in the north Atlantic.
Fabulous, thank you Dating Buzzer!
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