pbp

Let us go once more into the breach and return for a few moments to 'the gym', (ba-ba-ba-bam - think Beethoven's 5th symphony) and its hidden dangers.

One of those dangers is running into a particularly beautiful person that you would dearly like to impress - and as I have mentioned before in, Why treadmills are the anti-christ, I am seriously un-impressive at the gym. (unless you are going for tremendous falling over belly laughs as the way to encourage someone to dig you...in which case I am golden!) hmmm...

I am tragically uncoordinated, thin, un-curvy, and have the over-all strength of a six year old on a good day - so what i was thinking at the gym this time still remains a touch of a mystery. But apparently my brain checked out in the presence of this particulary beautiful person (we will just refer to them as 'PBP' from now on - because who doesn't love a meaningless acronym) :)

I am walking, just a bit unsteady over to the weights section of the gym, after pushing a little too hard on the eliptical - so my knees have vanished and been replaced by water, when PBP calls my name and walks up to me. Now there is a bit of an awkward moment because usually we greet each other with a hug - but usually we are out and not both hot and sweaty at the gym.

So running through my mind are such thoughts as:
'do I give him a hug?'
'will it make him uncomfortable?'
'do I smell?'
'yummy, he looks good!'
all in the space of a nano-second (isn't the human brain amazing!!)

So after the mutual hesitation, we both give in and give each other a quick hug, exchange some light pleasantries and then return to our respective work-outs. I make my way over to some leg machines (I have a set rotation for which machines I use on which days) and I realize half way through the set that these machines are WAY more suggestive of an exercise than I had intended...oops (blush!!)

I glance around to see where PBP is and thankfully he wasn't looking in my direction at all ... whew! (but also, if I am honest, some slight disappointment, I am capricous that way-haha)

So I continue a ridiculously intense workout catching glimses of PBP in the gym's 3 million mirrors - sigh - which distracts me and I constantly lose count of how many reps I just did, so I have to start over! (ouch) My muscles are screaming at me to stop but my brain keeps saying, 'just 5 more minutes' and I don't want to look like the wimp that I am so I keep pushing...until...my body decides to get the last laugh.

PBP is behind me (looking completely awesome) and I have taken up residence on a mat to stretch and do sit-ups with a weight ball (a unique form of torture) BUT, my muscles have had enough - and they give out and I almost drop the 4 pound weight ball...on my face...
this is the point where I fully appreciate the ridiculousness of what I am doing and burst out laughing.

Perfect! Not only do I look like a complete weakling, I am also a lunatic laughing randomly at nothing...yeah! Very impressive - my work here is done!! PBP will absolutely be avoiding me in the future and in the meantime I am trying to figure out if I could make it any worse by crawling to the dressing room since I am positive that my legs will not support me the 10 feet I have to go to the lockers.

What do you think, time to switch gyms? Yeah, I am seriously considering it :)